MEMEHUNTER

One hard shove.

So. Here I am back in sunny Scotland. Actually, it's been cocking cold and miserable for a few days now, which is DEEPLY frustrating as the rest of Britain seems to be enjoying a phew-what-a-scorcher style heatwave. I can now feel smug, however, for the sunshine up here is very pleasantly warm, with a cool breeze sweeping across the sea. A sunny day, a simple friendship... ah, life.

Moved in to my new flat on sat. ROCKS it does. Centre of town. Just got me in it etc. Some small problems to get fixed; washing machine was non-functional, light switch in bathroom did nuffink and the catch on the window in the living/bedroom seemed to have been bent upwards. Somewhat as if it had been... forced? No, don't be ridiculous, who would have forced the flat window open? The same people who moved the window box off the window sill perhaps? Pah, no.

Don't be ridiculous.

Anyway, all these things were fixed. Washing machine now works, bathroom exceedingly well lit, window catch replaced.

2 evenings ago the police came round. Asked me who lived in the flat. I said well, I did. They took my details and the name of the previous occupant from me and wandered off. A bit odd, thinks I, but settle down to continue watching a DVD. Went to bed about 1.00, was kept awake for a while by the sound of the seagulls surrounding my new area having a party, but lay in the darkness, sort of drifting off.

At 2.10 (I know because I checked), I heard footsteps outside. You
can hear people walking along the street outside my flat, so it didn't
bother me immediately, but just as I started to think "you know, that
sounds kind of... close", I heard somebody say "they've replaced the
lock" and then force my bedroom window open.

Yuh.

I've given some thought to what I would have liked to be able to
shout at that point. Something like "what the FUCK do you think
you're doing", or "GET THE FUCK AWAY FROM MY FLAT" or possibly just
"AVAST!", but under the circumstances (mad, adrenaline fueled
scrabble for glasses and lightswitch) the best I could manage was a
sort of low-register "heyyy". Anyway, they vanished like lightning.
And I got out of bed and stared at my open window and the section of
the *new* window latch that had just *pinged* off when the window was opened.

I called the police at this point. They appeared very quickly.

All very odd. I went round to my letting agents yesterday to tell them.
They were gratifyingly shocked. They said that the flat was only
empty for 1 day (Friday) and then cleaned on sat. So I guess that's
when the peoples decided to break in the first time... or something.
My agents assured me that they were going to make my flat "as secure
as possible". I was hoping for gun turrets, but they've opted for more or less nailing my windows shut. Not quite what I had in mind.

posted by Memehunter @ 11:20 AM